The Hope Share The Partnership at Drugfree.org
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Helping an addict never helps

No matter how hard I tried to help my son cope with life or solve his problems, I failed.  All I did was enable him to continue to mess up and not take responsibility for anything.  He got everything he wanted and I got nothing but more misery.  Saying "no" to him was the hardest thing I have ever had to do, but it saved both of our lives (at least for the time being).  I pray I can stay strong enough to say no to him when he leaves rehab and needs my help again.   

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Categories: Family, Son, Recovery, Rehab

Comments3

February 03, 2013 | Diana

Stay Strong. Finally getting the courage to say No to your addict child is a true testament of your love for him. I have walked this path too and am still walking it. My son is 5 months in to a 6 month program and getting stronger every day. Today I have peace that he is in a good place and that if I hadnt finally said NO to him he may still be using or worse, he may be gone forever. My son thanks me everyday for finally saying no to him and making him leave my home. He hit bottom that day and now he is trying to rebuild his life. Hang in there. You are a wonderful mother who obviously loves her child

January 19, 2013 | Mary

Let me start off by saying you are a wonderful mother! Not because you give in to your son at all, but because you said No to him even though it was breaking your heart! I can also tell you that your son does love you dearly! It was never him as a person that caused you so much misery and heart ache; it was the addiction he was feeding that had taken control of his mind, body, and soul. I can say that to you because I have overcome addiction nine years now and when I was on drugs I was awful to my mother! I stole from her and lied to her and broke her heart many times!! It was never because I did not love her, I adored her and still do! She never gave up on on me and had to show me hard love and it worked in the end! Let me also say that her prayers among others saved me from the addiction! Cause even though I was not living right she always prayed for me and I know that’s why I am still alive today! So don’t ever think your son doesn’t love you and doesn’t feel bad for what he has done because he does! He may not show it or act it right now because he is still in the battle but he will in time! So don’t give up on him or yourself and always remain strong in this battle no matter the cost! Because you being strong is what is keeping him alive!!

January 16, 2013 | Jane

Stay strong!

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